Dear Professor Birthday Boy Bob:

Please excuse Glenn from completing his essay, “Keep Crimson Tied: BDSM Themes In Funny Fantasy Anthologies” as he is dead.

Glenn was killed repeatedly by numerous science fiction and fantasy authors, artists, and according to this eyewitness depiction by Lar DeSouza, some 15-year-old girls on a furry anime kick.

Glenn appreciates your understanding that death finally turns out to have an advantage. Rest assured, he will be back to life soon and will contribute between times in the grave.

Signed,

Epstein’s mother

Tales of the Crimson Keep – Newly Renovated Edition will be on sale in August.